By Ăngel Luis LĂłpez â The Nomad Build
Category: Mindset / Self-Mastery / Financial Freedom
Location: Tampa, Florida
Introduction
Thereâs a price we all pay when we chase the wrong things.
And the most expensive thing Iâve ever bought⌠didnât come from a store.
It was validation.
Validation cost me my money, my time, my health â and my peace.
For years, I lived to be seen instead of to be stable.
I thought I was building success.
In reality, I was building a prison that sparkled.
The Illusion of Success
I had the waterfront apartment, the financed car, and even a boat.
From the outside, I looked like I was living the dream.
But behind the curtain, it was a nightmare.
Every weekend was the same cycle â brunches, bottles, and people who only showed up when I was paying.
I was working just enough to keep the image alive, not the dream.
The truth was, I wasnât chasing happiness â I was running from loneliness.
And I didnât even realize it.
Every swipe of the credit card, every round of drinks, every night trying to impress strangers â it all came from one wound that I hadnât healed yet:
âIâm not enough.â
The Downward Spiral
Validation is like a drug. The more you feed it, the hungrier it gets.
I started losing control â getting drunk, getting into fights, even getting arrested.
I was angry at the world but really, I was angry at myself.
One night, I ended up fighting a bouncer and injured my spine.
To this day, I still feel the pain from that moment.
A permanent reminder of how expensive that lifestyle really was.
I thought I was buying fun.
But I was really buying pain, guilt, and regret â on a payment plan.
The Turning Point
There came a morning when I looked around my waterfront apartment, surrounded by bills, and realized:
Everything I owned⌠owned me.
That was the moment I decided to let go.
I gave the car back.
I let the boat go.
I cut my subscriptions, stopped going out, and started cooking at home.
I stopped trying to look rich and started trying to be free.
And slowly, something powerful started happening â
I began to breathe again.
My bank account wasnât empty.
My mind wasnât clouded.
And for the first time in a long time, I felt peace.
The things you let go of become the space where peace can finally live.
The Lesson
Validation had me broke, but self-control made me wealthy.
Every dollar I stopped wasting started compounding.
Every good habit I built replaced a bad one.
And before long, the discipline I once hated became the peace I now protect.
I learned that wealth isnât about money â itâs about margin.
Margin of time, margin of freedom, margin of energy.
And you canât have any of those when youâre constantly spending to feel seen.
The Deeper Truth
Most people who chase validation arenât shallow â theyâre hurt.
Theyâre the kids who grew up feeling unseen.
And now theyâre adults still trying to buy the attention they never got.
But you donât heal by being seen.
You heal by being known â first by yourself.
When I finally faced my past and asked why I needed attention so badly, I discovered something important:
I was never broken.
I was just disconnected from who I really was.
Once I reconnected, the need for validation disappeared.
Thatâs when I became free.
The Challenge
So hereâs your challenge this week:
- Audit your life.
- Cut one unnecessary expense.
- Cancel one subscription that doesnât serve you.
- Say no to one temptation that drains you.
Then take that time, that energy, that money â and invest it in yourself.
Read, pray, walk, create.
Because freedom isnât built in one leap.
Itâs built in a thousand small ânoâsâ that protect your âyes.â
Closing Thought
You canât buy peace â but you can build it, one honest choice at a time.
If this message resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it.
And remember:
âYou canât fill a void inside by feeding your ego. You fill it by facing your truth.â
đ§ Listen to the full episode: The Cost of Validation
(Available soon on Spotify, Apple Podcasts & YouTube.)
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